Julia's Funny Ass Stories

Ok, here's the weird and funny stories Julia has told me that I mentioned in her info. Enjoy!

Meter Fun

One time while Julia was sitting in her basement playing her playstation she suddenly heard laughing coming from upstairs followed by her mum shouting "What the hell?!" Julis looked up the staris as her brother and some of his friends came down, still laughing, with a parking meter. Yes, a parking meter. Julia started laughing then her brother and his friends spent like an hour breaking it open.

Cheer Up Before The Wall

Julia and some of her friends were walking around. Her friends were really bumbed out for some reason. Julia told them that if they didn't cheer up she would start singing at the top of her lungs. They didn't believe her and didn't cheer up. So when they got infront of what I think she was was a restruant she stood on a low wall infront of it and starting singing at the top of her lungs. I don't remember what song she said she sang. She got other people to join in. Her friends couldn't believe her and kept looking down and shaking their heads.

Hot Cat

Once when Julia was sick her mum was doing the laundry when Julia suddenly heard her yell "What the fuck?!" Julia jumped up and ran down the steps of her basement. she asked what was wrong as her cat ran and hid behind her. Her mother kept yelling and swearing as she explained how the cat had been in the dryer. Her mum had put in a load of wet clothes and started it up. Before she left she could year a REAAAAAAAOW! thud, REAAAAAAAOW thud. Julia had the hardest time not laughing. She asked her mum, "Didn't you know he likes to sleep in the dryer with the dry clothes?" Her mum was like, "No!"

Mics Can Use The Bathroom

Julia's brother was in the musical at school. The cast was taking a break during rehersal when this one kid had to go to the bathroom. So he went, but he forgot to turn his mic off. so everyone in the auditorium heard "zip" then the sound og him peeing. Everyone started laughing. The directors face was red he was laughing so hard. finally he told Julia's brother Anthony to go tell the kid his mic was on. Anthony went and banged on the door. The kid didn't answer so he banged again. The kid was like "Dude leave me alone. I'm trying to take a piss." Anthony was like "Dude your mic is on." The kid was like "Oh shit!" Then he turned it off.

Mics And Giants Don't Mix

Ok, in this one play where they the people in the scene had to look up at a giant. The cast hadbeen having probs with their mics. they kept picking up raido frequencies. Anthony had a line to say and he had his mouth open to say it when over his mic came "Those are some of the biggest brests I've ever seen!" (It was from some radio show, can't remeber who's) What made it even fuinnier was they were looking up at a female giant.

Follow The Bouncing Heel

Another play they did was the true Cinderella. Meaning the was it was origionally written by the Grims brothers. Well in the origional story when Cinderella's step sisters tried on the slipper one of them lost their heel. The heel was a little rubber ball. During one of the perfomaces the ball fell out and sarted bouncing across the stage. Anthony picked it up and threw it into the audieence. Someone caught it and threw it back.

Thank God For Dairy Queens Sound Proof Walls

Julia and her friend Ashley were walking around her old home town. Ashly saw a penny candy store and said "Hey lets go in." Julia told her it was closed, Ashley said it wasn't. Julia again said it was. Ashley didn't believe her and went to open the door. When she grabbed the handle a loud alarm started going off. Ashley quickly let go then her and Julia calmly, but quickly went to the Dairy Queen across the street. Once inside they couldn't hear the alarm. The walls were basically sound proof.

Sing-n-Run

One time Julia and Ashley ran through Squrril Hill singing a song at the top of their lungs. Can't remember what Julia said what the song was. People started applauding them as they ran and sang.

The Shampoo Is Out To Get Us

One time while Julia was taking a shower a huge bottle of shampoo fell on her foot. When it did she shouted really loud "FUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!!!" Her mum came running up to see what was wrong, she asked Julia what was wrong and Julia was yelling and swearing at how the shampoo bottle had fallen on her foot. Her mum started laughing.

Problem Cow

This happened at another musical. This was during the performaces. On opening night of the play (don't remember what it was called) there was this one scene where Julia's brother Anthony had to say "To find your cow" and snap then the cow (it was a fake cow on wheels) was supposed to come out and stop by him. Well he said the line, and snapped, but the cow didn't come. He snapped again, still didn't come, he snapped a third time and finally it came out and stopped next to him. He threw his hands in and the air and was like "Yeah!" The audience started clapping. On another night, same scene, when Anthony snapped the cow came out, but instead of stopping it flew past him. He paused for a minute then pointed and said "Cow go that way." Then on another night (same play, different scene) the cow was supposed to come out, moo, then fall on its side. Well it came out and mooed, but instead of falling on it's side it fell on its face. So Anthony tackled the cow onto it's side then he either stood or sat where he was and got all serious and said "Bessy's (that wasn't the cows name, I can't remember it so I'm using Bessy) dead." Then someone from the back of the audience shouted "No shit you killed her!" Of course everyone started laughing.

Don't Give The Butler The Wine Bottle

During another play called The Mystery Of Edwin Drood, Anthony played some dude who carried the wine bottle out. Well one night he was walking off stage when he stopped right before the curtin, looked at the audience, then drank whatever was in the bottle, then walked off stage.

Turkey Sled

One time, Julia's mum asked her and her friend Ashley to go to the store near their house and get a turkey cooking thing. (can't remember what it's caled) Well Julia and Ashley went and got it. There was a hill they had to walk down on the way back. (You can probably guess what they did) The two of them sat in the turkey cooking thing and rode down the hill. When they reached the bottom there was a big hold in the bottom. When they got back to Julia's house her mum had them go get another one and said before they left "This time, don't use it for a sled."

Well, whacha think? Funny? I'll add more as I hear them.